A wedding in September

Supposedly the inauguration of two love-birds into holy matrimony.

Dont get me wrong, it was a spectacular event for the newlyweds, but not so much for the guess particularly those who were families of indo-chinese decendants.
Let me just say, i too, before should be blamed for judging and throwing comments at the event. My apologies, but today i managed to shed a light into my small brain and realized that it was unnecessary.

I should start by declaring that it was not a typical indo-chinese wedding, since it was not a seated-dinner arrangement and there were no chinese dishes whatsoever yet it was, IMHO, a fabolous party.

1. The food.
Hail to PePeNERO for serving some of their finest food for the wedding. As a guest, my pallate was amused with the range of pizza, pasta, salad, bread, calamari and fruits provided, not to mention an open BAR of liquor boooyaaaaaaaaaaaah that will keep on being served until midnight.

For me or those big fans of cucina italiana, the food is heaven and you simply cant ask for more of what's being served. But not with the indo-chinese relatives, they first complained for not being able to find rice, and then moved on to tasteless food, in their humble opinion.

2. The Venue
Im not much of a wedding-goer, but this is my first time attenting a wedding in a classy, decent, delicious italian restaurant considering that this is an indo-chinese wedding, this wedding is AWESOME. I must say i didnt think that this was possible.

Indonesians do away with Balai Kartini, Hotel's ballroom, garden houses, beach party, but Italian resto? decent italian resto, open bar?? get real.. this doesn't come around that often. Some of my friends envied me for going to this wedding, cause they know they too would have a good time.

Again the guests complained on how there were no chairs and there were tired of wearing high heels. hmm.. yuhu.. i recalled the MC announcing numerous times that there are tables and chairs outside (for smokers) and upstairs. Plus, there were a bar and a bar stool.  Look around much?

3. The Bride and Groom
Now this would be what i called typical Indo commnet, not just Indo-chinese. They would say something like this: "hmm i believe the previous boyfriend was more handsome" or "eeekkhh i prefer the previous girlfriend" or "OMG look at the make-up, it's so last year" or "the dress could be use for curtains".

4. The Questions for Singles
A slight derogation to the focus of the wedding, this is just something ordinary in any Indo or probably any wedding. A question asked to those supposedly miserable singles "when will you tie the knot?" or "what are you waiting for?" or "your wedding next month".

5. The Guess
You can hear and see people wander the room to check who is there and who is not there and continue to ponder on why he/she is or is not there. Thus, make comments as to why one close to the heart (in their opinion) or one close to home (speaking demography) is not invited.

The story between the lines are these:
We often forget that it is not our wedding, regardless of what culture we are in (be aware that im not a big fan of ridiculous proceedings), weddings are about those being tied in holy matrimony. It may also be a celebration for parents who have been raising them, but the star of the show is the bride and groom. When you are the star, the odds are ,most of the time, things are going to be decorated, tailored and presented in a way that suits your preference and not others - family or not, chinese or not.
So dont be baffled by the fact the things does not suit your preferred dietary restriction, the fact that people do stay and drink till they drop, the fact that you dont like any of the things being served does not matter, it's their show.

Again, it is THEIR wedding. As much as I want to invite the whole world, and pick a venue that can fit the whole world, it is not ours to say, it;s theirs, the bride and groom. All decisions I believed has be tailored to suit their financial abilities and preferred options; unless mom and dad are the ones paying :P
Unfortunately, i live in a society that needs to invite each and every one even those with the slightest connection be it blood or acquaintance. The irony is that, everyone agreed on how expensive weddings are here, and yet, even when the resources are not sufficient, they still insist to have the so-called "INDO wedding"  meaning inviting everyone within 5km radius from home and work, oh dont forget relatives whom you have never heard or seen before but surely exists cause you uncle from your father's second cousin daughter's second wife is still alive. It is believed to be extremely rude not to invite everyone but no consideration on who should be responsible to pay for it all.
Dont even think to rebutt me with the argument of "BEP" (break even point) when you invite the big guns. Meaning you might make a profit even when you invite and throw a MEGA party. Jeeezzz, weddings are not meant to be a business (maybe for Wedding organizers) but not for the bride and groom whose goal is to celebrate their love.

Last but not least, stereotypes and typical questions. I know culture, norms and habits only change slowly through a couple of hundred years, but do we really need to uphold all the ridiculous things that evolves around it just for the sake of not being the talk of the town?
I can guarantee most will say it is not an easy thing to do (being different, going against what is considered normal) but when will it change if it does not start with us?

The bottomline of my experience tonight was that why cant people do away with us being ourself? is it so hard to just ignore or even pretend that we like everything they did cause we know it meant a lot for them?
And we are expected to care about those we barely know, how is this possible, when in our daily life where all of the interactions and experiences actually matters, those so-called relatives or acquaintences are never present?
Humans dont go living their life only of memories of how their parents won the war and how his fellow platoons save their lifes, we go on living and sorting who-is-who in our life by going through life with them, not the other way around.

Let there be more weddings like this (venue, food and choice of music wise) without the miniscule, ignorant,  narrow-minded guests.

Cursed

how would one realizes that they are being cursed?

do they turn ugly? do they stumble into a mud pit accidentally? do they go broke after 2 games of poker? or do they got their heart broken? or do they just simply cant feel and be happy?

even when one feels that they are being cursed, one would think what got them cursed? what did they do to get it? what did they say? what didnt they do?

what would be worse? to always feel cursed or to suddenly realized that we are being cursed after believing that we are born with luck and blessings?

the things that i've come to feel and realize brought me to the notion that my luck cease to exist, and that i've always been cursed but i was led to believe that i was blessed.

Pertama

one of the first entertaining conclusion i came up with at my new office.

#1 whoever get a seat close to the air con (split air con) needs to be aware, you are put there for a reason. it's usually because you would most likely still be working (or waiting) by the time the central air con is turned off.

:(