Quote of the Day

"my ex(s) are not my friends" by Buncit.

good ya mate!

Quote of the Day

"my ex(s) are not my friends" by Buncit.

good on ya mate!

I Say a little Prayer for You

this is probably the best time to really say a little prayers for my beloved friends.

I know that you are going through some difficult times, i may not be the best person to give you advise and i may not be able to comfort you the way you need me to. But one thing is for sure, regardless of whether you believe in God or not, i am praying that things will work out fine.

if i am given a choice between painful-hard-nervewrecking truth and nice-comforting lies, waste no time my friends as i will always choose truth, no matter how painful it is.

i wished "he" had the guts to tell me the truth instead of leaving me in the dark. "He" must have thought that it was a heroic thing to do, to just let me believe that he was the bad guy, while i knew he was lying. I felt undermined for not being able to handle truth and not to be able to tell that he was lying to my face. But, that's the past. i have managed to let it go.

back to the issue at hand..
my dearest friends, i know that you may know this already but i just wanted to remind you that i am here if you need me, im just a phone call away, always have always will be.

Good Luck.

look what i bumped into

my horoscope of the day:

"Your intense energy may not appeal to everyone, but you should never try to hide it."

Hell YEAH!!!!!

the kid in me

starting from this point on, i will mostly write about what i feel towards HIM -whose name should not be mentioned hence i should really try to forget about him- in this blog. the main reason being is that buncit is really, really, really, seriously, really getting tired of me talking about HIM all the time. although in my defense, he is not all i talk about all the time, but when it comes to the topic of guys, well.. im guilty as charged.

as i was trying to finish the second part of my international law exam, everytime i heard an sms on my phone (isnt it weird to hear your sms on your phone? but anyway you are smart enough to understand what i mean, i couldnt be bothered thinking of a proper way to describe it), i was hoping that it would be from HIM. *cheeky mode*. the first two was not, but finally there was one from him. the content was nothing about me or asking about what i am doing at the moment or trying to engage in a conversation, BUT, it led to a conversation. or at least i decided to call instead of texting him back thus made a conversation out of it (im pathetic arent i?). the whole conversation lasted waaay longer than i had expected (say bye bye to new boots).

i was going to pretend my signal failed and hung up so that i wouldnt have to spend money and just use my optus yesTime, but i decided not to. remembering that i dont really call anyone that much anymore and i am still paying the cap full amount and i was really enjoying the convo and it would be such a turn off to do that. so it went really long. longest so far and it was nice. i mean we get to have a decent conversation, he gets to talk, i get to talk, we get to argue a bit not much (which is usually unlikely to happen), he gets to give me an advice and support and i get to tease him and still give support. :P anyway.. im just a happy kid at the moment. it's like getting a massage at the end of a busy day at work. im so easy to please arent i?

however, approaching to the 50th minute, we might be running out of topic and obviously both of us were tired coz of the preliminary olympic round game this morning, i still managed to put forward my 'two cents' on his behaviour towards me. i said it was lovely to have a conversation with him without wanting to kill him (at least this is how i feel), hence i always wonder why this does not happen when we are around each other. peace and a good convo happens either over the phone or the internet, pure presence would start third world war. of course as usual he didnt really answer my notion and since i suggested that i might be the one being too sensitive about it, he jumped into the opportunity and tells me that it's just me. although i've consulted several witness and they all agree with me that he DOES treat me differently.

a friend reminds me that i should no longer look for approval from those who does not deserve it at the very beginning. but can this thing with him indicates that? i dont think so. but it does indicates my curiosity about how he perceives me and what makes him treat me differently. i was just thinking as i said to buncit that the only thing i havent done to kill my curiosity is telling him how i feel, but this may never happen as we all know it. im just not that stupid, or probably not yet. the last time it took me 4 years before i finally did something like this. i couldnt help noticing how he has the potential to be the "one", but the question remains whether he is the one for me. now, i dont want to get head over heels in this one but let's not get carried away. i dont even have positive feedbacks on my effort (i assume i made efforts, numerous efforts to indicate my feelings, or so i believe). i shouldnt be dreaming of anything more than his courtesy and his friendship.

im such a kid this way. wee... gimme candy...

It's a Blessing

i recently complained to a friend about the things that i don't have at the moment, building a relationship with HIM- who i seem to be having problems forgetting- and someone i used to consider as my best friend.

a friend told me to be grateful of what you dont have at the moment. It is all a blessing. Simply because having them in my life would only add up the complexities and burdens in life.

a positive way to look at things.

you would always know when it's the right time

got back from Adelaide freakin early in the morning. came back to Melbourne with less sleep, revitalize for life and a news. dont get me wrong though. the trip was just what i desperately needed. to be with a friend.

things that i got back with was that, you would never know where life takes you. no matter how strategically and well-planned you goals and aims are, there are still things that happen beyond you imaginable dreams, and they usually shifts your priority and the goals that you have planned before. this does not mean that it's bad, it could end up bad, but also great. Moreover, you would always know what is the right thing to do because you just do and because it would be the time to do it.

forgive me for being vague, since i still dont have the authority to elaborate on the details. maybe later.

i always wonder, would my time come sooner or later? geez, the thought of going through major changes from what i might have planned frightened me. would i be able to deal with it? would there be someone else in the picture? most importantly would i be able to find someone?

these are all in my head. inquisition of my own life. they just wont go away. wish i get that same excitement when im doing my research. Enough said, i should be heading back to my assignments, since i am going to do easters on ANZAC's day. got no time to waste. me on tight schedule. let's see how long this will last.